Inside the mind of a Kindergartner

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Below are 25 questions every parent should ask their child once in their little lives. The answers you receive just might surprise you…

Today I am sitting down with my son Jaxon for an informal interview. Getting inside the mind of a kindergartner; if you will. I must say, this wasn’t an easy task. Getting a five-year old to sit down with me for longer than ten minutes took a lot of Halloween candy and letting him have full access of what he considered the best candy!

The Interview:
J=Jaxon
M=Mommy

Who’s your best friend?
J: Avery (stated without hesitation), but really all the kids in the school that I know.
M: What makes Avery so awesome?
J: I don’t know.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
J: A ton of things.
M: How about you tell me just one of them?!
J: Well the first of them… a soldier, a pilot, and (he squints hard thinking of the word) a lawyer, a “maker”. And that’s it!
M: Aw. Why do you want to be a lawyer?
J: Because Daddy’s turning into one.

What football team do you support?
J: I like football!
M: OK, lol. What team do you like best Buddy?!
J: Big Green Packers and Big Orange Longhorns!
Todd: (in the back ground, “yes!!!”

If you could have one superpower, what would it be and why?
J: Stretching and stretching really far.
M: Why?
J: Because if there is something really far away and one of my legs is broken I can just streeeeeetch and still get to it!
M: That is a very good point Buddy!

What are the five best things about being you?
J: I’m funny, I try my best to color, and (as he looks at the fish in the living room), we get tons of fish, I was my nails great in the shower, and I have lots of toys.
M: Ok, those are all great things about you that I love too!

What’s the funniest thing you’ve ever seen?
J: The funniest thing I’ve ever seen is pee! Well really butts, like the butt, wait not like the but on your body.
M: ((I look at him skeptical)) What kind of “but”?
J: You know when the machine is still going; like but, but, but… ((He says with a stutter!)) Lol

If you had three wishes, what would they be?
J: I’d want to be a superhero, never-dying, and making sure my teeth never fall out.
M: Oh wow! Those are very well thought out!

Can you name one thing that scares you?
J: When Nadia jumps out and says “Boo”
M: Yeah, that always scares me too!

What do you do when you’re scared to make it less scary?
J: I hug myself and hyperventilate!
M: ((After he demonstrated and I stop laughing, I had to run to the bathroom to pee!!))

What’s the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?
J: Giving me toys
M: Hmm, who gave you toys?
J: I don’t know, well Nadia. She gave me a kitty mask.
M: Aw, and she is definitely your friend!

Would you rather give up TV, chocolate or friends?
J:  Nothing!
M: But you have to choose.
J: But all of them are so great.
M: ((Laughing)) You have to pick one, this is hypothetical
J: Mommy I cannot choose, can we just skip this one.

Who are your three best role models?
J: I Don’t know.
M: Well you already said you want to be a lawyer like daddy, is it safe to say he is a role model?
J: sure.
M: lol

Who’s the worst person in the world?
J: Donald Trump, He’s my enemy!
M: Ok then….

What does heaven look like?
J: I don’t know, I’ve never been to heaven.

How do you describe me to your friends?
J: I just show you to them.
M: Fair enough. ((I’m at his school a lot))

What is the most disgusting thing you can think of?
J: Pee Pee- Diarrhea Steam- Poopy Pants- Esquire
M: (I almost peed laughing so hard!)
J: CAPTIAN UNDERPANTS!!

What is the grossest thing you’ve ever eaten?
J: Ketchup
M: Legit, you have only tried it once.

What is the first thing you can remember?
J: Death….
M: Huh…
J: nothing
M: O. K. …………

If you could be anyone in the world for a day, who would it be and why?
J: Mr. Fantastic

If you could change one law, what would it be?
M: ((He looks confused)) you may phone a friend.
J: (consulting daddy) Kids can drive!!

What’s the hardest thing about being a child?
J: That I’m short and can’t reach stuff!

If you could time-travel, where and when would you go?
J: Pokémon World!

Which five words describe you best – and which five words describe me best?
J: I’m cute, funny, snuggly, Ninja, deadly! You are big, happy, beautiful, responsible, and fair!
M: Wow! Those are good words ((I did not help him on any of those words!!))

What’s the most amazing thing you’ve ever heard?
J: Pokémon! Pokémon! Pokémon!
M: ????

What are three things you’ve learnt today?
J: One thing is to be responsible. To be caring and fair.
M: Where did you learn those words Jaxon?
J: At school!
M: But you were home sick today…?
J: I know!
M:????

26 What’s your favorite toy?
J: My Pokémon toys.

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